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30 April 2011

The Things Spammers Send Us

The things spammers will do just to get their filth opened!

Just now in my bulk mail folder: “How to Enlarge Penis Size” and “Enlarge and Lengthen Your Member.”

Oh yeah… Curiosity killed the cat… But honestly… As if naman

We males are all vain in that department! We wouldn’t admit to it even if it was no bigger than a Vienna sausage. And opening a spam with that sort of subject header is tantamount to an admission; so did whoever send these really think…???

“Safe and Secure Viagra.” I can understand the safe part – side effects are well documented – but secure? Just how, pray tell, can Viagra be secure…?

“Heavily Discounted Copies of Swiss Watches.” Reminds me of wanna-buy-watch scenes in old black and white Pinoy movies where watches with palito parts were sold to unsuspecting customers. Did Dolphy star in those…???

“The Weekend Pill at an Affordable Price.” And what – exactly – is the weekend pill…? Sorry, but I am totally unsophisticated in the pills department.

“Radiology Is Fast-Growing and Exciting.” And the hell I care… My idea of excitement is seeing the ball hitting the back of the net… Most especially if it came off my boot…

“Become a CSI.” CSI in Las Vegas. CSI – Miami. CSI – New York. Yeah, right… Maybe I can star in my own series… CSI – Lipa… Oooohhh… That’ll be exciting…!!!

Oh, well… A man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do… If a spammer’s gotta send his spam…

I gotta hit that DELETE button…

[This story was first published on Facebook on 23 July 2008.]

Life Without A Cell Phone…